Months ago

You know how in some moments, you just want to give up? But people would say, look back to say, 3 months of 6 months ago, how was life back then? How was I during that time?

6 months ago, I am still carrying Harris in my tummy. Still thinking where I want to have labour. Still thinking of my financial crisis. Fir's still trying to find a job. Surviving with his part time job salary. And me, having TOO MUCH negative thinking. 6 months ago, I am struggling. Emotional meltdowns. The thought of having baby scares me. New mother's dilemma. And will I ever be able to love my baby unconditionally. Everything. And see where I am now?

LOVING EVERY SECONDS SPENT.

I feel very occupied. Barely have time for any negative thinking that usually comes when I am idling. Which I would rather spend time staring at my baby and seeing Fir so good at handling Harris (but still have loads to learn), I feel blessed. Everyday Harris get to see his grandparent & uncles aunties too. Especially Asu. I am blessed. Alhamdulillah. I couldnt be any more thankful.

Compared to other people, of course my life would be described as, decent. No traveling, no adventure, just simple. But if you stop comparing, and focus on your life, you would feel more contented and grateful.

Its just a matter of time before things will slowly fall in place. 6 months ago, I never thought my life would be better. After all the hardships, ease will come after. In sha Allah.

May everything we do in life will benefit us in the hereafter. In sha Allah.

Wasalam. Love, Nina M. ♥