Things I realized

I AM EASILY DISTRACTED AND ONE HELLA PROCRASTINATOR. 

Yea, I just gotta highlight that because seriously, I cant be focusing on only one thing. I just need to be doing something along with listening and it makes me giving only half the attention when I should be giving FULL attention. And I've been procrastinating, a lot. I mean, my classes is conducted online and I still got piles of assignments to complete and papers to read for my literature review, etc etc (the list goes on and on) and guess what? I can have all the time in the world but I cant still get my eyes (and fingers) off games and scrolling social medias. I just cant seem to pull myself out of bed every morning and use my time wisely. I'm just so undisciplined and I hate that. But hating it is (obviously) not enough hating because days goes on the same lazy pattern I regretting myself every single day! 

My semester goes on with classes conducted online and I cant seem to be focusing. I would spend time playing games (keep my fingers going except writing because I cant be writing & listening attentively at the same time) while listening to lectures and that's like 50% of attention. And as much as multi tasking is good, I could be getting more info if I give full 100% attention to listening, no? I truly have some issues with doing one thing and one thing only. I get impatient because I like to shorten waiting times and getting things done in a blink of an eye but duhhh of course its impossible. 

I am not complaining about chores, because I do most chores and I love doing all that. It's just when it comes to studying and focusing, I just couldnt pull myself out of laziness and utilizing hours focusing on doing assignments. Especially when one assignment that can be done in an hour, I spent more time on it, because I would be playing games alternately only after reading one paragraph! 

But not with reading fictions, or doing chores. I can read the whole book before doing something else. What is it with me and focusing, utilizing my brains for studying and classes???

I can focus, but I get selective. I dont know. I need to have better self-discipline. At least keeping a routine like normal working days. Even I have problem with normal working days routine. Coming late to work. Spending more time on screen than actually doing my work. 

I need to be self-discipline and stop being lazy. Just fyi, I have TWO more days to ganti puasa! How many days does a human need to be keeping routine anyway? 

So for tonight, I'm going to complete my OSHE assignment, amending a bit on my Research Methodology, planning for my OSHE PMA and start amending reports and slides for my Research Methodology. Yeap, a lot in line. Hope I can be keeping in routine and be a much more disciplined person and utilizing every seconds I have doing beneficial thing and that exclude social medias and games! (or maybe I could reduce the game time instead of eliminating it).

Wasalam. Love, Nina M. 

After so long

I've always been an avid reader. And I read fast. I can finish Harry Potter thick book within 3 days. But what's the use of reading it fast and not understanding it, right? So after years and years of training, I can read fast and able to understand everything in one go.

Around last year, I went out with Anis and I get to drop by at Kinokuniya and I bought two books. One is Uniform Building by Law book and another is a fiction book. And so I thought, I'm gonna read them straight away. But guess what? I just finally open the packaging 3 days ago, lol.

And so, as usual for this book, I finished them in one day. It's not that thick and the story line is legit cool. But the ending was rather disappointing. I miss being so fully immersed in books and my mood was rather uplifted, I mean with this MCO and all. And actually I have few books I bought but never get to read but I left it my parent's house, so...... I might purchase some more online. As much as reading is good, my selection of books is the opposite. I dont read about real life stories. I love fiction more than anything. Something I can imagine and something rather made up. Real life scares me sometimes, I'd rather not dwell myself in it. Issues with myself. But I do read about it sometimes. But something more like chick lit-ty. Close enough, eh? 

But really, working from home, online class, assignments and PMA, well, not the best time to be reading books, right? But what the hell, I need time to get back to my usual self. Reading. Less screen time. Social medias bores me now. I'm more into news thingy nowadays.

And really, I should be appreciating all the time I have now with taking such good care of my skin, I know, but really I am not. Pimples partying, dry patch everywhere. Even my skin is not behaving well. My feet especially. Cracks here and there. Not cool. I should be taking this time to take such good care of it. Y'know, just to make me feel better, for someone that always have skin problems.


Just so you know, MCO is being extended for another two weeks, so..... we can win this! In sha Allah. Okay, I need to get my skin pampered now. And get some rest. I got online class tomorrow morning.

Wasalam. Love, Nina M.