Another sleepless night

It's midnight and I just slurped down a cup of coffee. Cant sleep just yet. I put Harris to bed and now, here I am, blogwalking again? I dont know. We just got home from show house. Yeap, in the midst of purchasing a house but still surveying for good deals. And we have to find new car too. And also, need to buy new mattress for Harris new endeavour: sleeping alone.

I'm just feeling a bit bitter and down today. The house we're surveying is like too pricey and of course we can afford it, its just that I dont think we'd be able to save some money for emergencies later. So yea, I guess we gotta kiss that one good bye. (Any developer sales person can hit me up please!). I'm looking for a house around Setiawangsa, Wangsa Maju area if I could but you know, the price here spikes up like mad due to so many amenities within reach and my location choices aint that much options, so yea. If only I could find 500k cash and just buy it though. Haihh.... There are a lot of other things I need to consider if I choose to find house other than the above mentioned area.

And you know what, I gotta survey for cars. I need a new car. Why? Because my viva is starting to worn out and the cost of maintaining and repairing is like, urm... a lot? Too many things to get at the moment. Commitments and all. Really, at some point, I think I can only afford one children. The cost of living these days. Maybe I should consider doing two jobs now.

I dont even know which to get first. It's giving me headache. Kan best kalau gaji ribu riban! Tomorrow is working day and I couldnt get myself to sleep.

I wish life was easier in so many ways. Like so so so so many ways. I should try and get myself to sleep. New day, new beginning. I wish....

When will this phase end? Wasalam. Love, Nina M. 

Cant sleep on a Sunday night

Harris's asleep. Husband out doing his part time job, as a mechanic. And me, showered, prayed, done my PM skincare routine and its Sunday night, and I just feel like a total wasteful holiday if I sleep early. So here I am, blogwalking. My schedule has been so tight and everyday I came home feeling so exhausted and would be on the bed by 10pm. Plus, my apartment's wifi sucks big time lately so I really dont have the mood to find anything to watch. We have called Unifi to install internet but it takes 5-7 days before they come to install. Currently using my mobile data's hotspot because really, alternating instagram and twitter ALL THE TIME exhaust me. I need bigger screens! Hence, laptop.

I have loads of things in my mind right now. I want to buy a house, to buy a car. But who am I kidding, I cant afford them! We're currently renting this house for RM1500 a month and I kid you not, at first, we thought renting was fun and all, but no. You're not even paying for your own home. So really, we both thought like, dang it, we should really find a house. With super loads of things to consider. Location especially. And I'm not really good with heights. My car also showing a bit of tantrums. But seriously, the price of a car these days are mad! The maintenance and all.

I really need to set a new target. I'm 28. And there are loads of things I want to achieve. But here I am, still cant even secure a new job.... (sigh)

All these dreams and wishes but it ended up, poof. Gone. No more. And did I mention I'm getting fatter? Yeap, bulging tummy. My skin condition? Haywire. Pimples everywhere. Dull. Site work has really taking its toll on me and nope, I aint happy.

I really need to do something with my life. Its a long train of thoughts tonight and I dont feel like its gonna end any time soon. But what the hell? Can we just focus on positive things today?

1. Spring cleaned my kitchen today! After so long of not cooking. Found FIVE (5) healthy ulat sampah grew to the size of Harris's thumb in my kitchen. Underneath the dirt and rotten eggs. Screamed all the way and husband come to the rescue. Realized I hoard a lot of things; plastics, rice packet, unused mineral bottles, egg tray. Euw amalina, gross. Thank god husband could help me with those eeeeek worms.

2. Went to Pasar Tani and bought veggies and fruits. Cooked lunch (after soooooooooo long). Spending time with Harris the whole day.

3. Took Harris and husband to the saloon for a haircut. Still contemplating whether to cut Harris's hair wholly or just a trim. His hair aint growing much though. I just hope he wont have scalp problems like my husband. Finally my two boys is well trimmed. So handsome. I'm in love.

4. Went to buy Mr. Muscle and washed the toilet. Its been unwashed for quite some time and I couldnt stand on the sight of it. Prayed that I wont have allergies later.

5. Had eczema breakout last week. Went to the clinic, got injected for allergies because my face all swollen. Now depending on allergy pills and steroids. Minimal steroids as its not good for breastfeeding mommies. Was feeling down the whole week because someone told me my skin look bad. So was feeling insecure. Now I'm on a good skincare track and eczema also toned down. Have to watch out whatever I touch. And never forget gloves for washing dishes.

6. Went to Mr. Diy and did a haul! Bought so much things to keep the house organized and I've never felt better. Just one more box to unpack and I'm so done with moving!

And absolutely anything for my cheeky baby. And hubs too. 

Well, of so much negative things that happens, I manage to counter it and turn it into things that makes me happy. But probably tonight, I was feeling so down and forgetful that I kinda need to blog it. Blogging makes me thinking of what to write, and reminds me how contented my life is. I just need a little reminder. And yea, striving for all the things that I want in life. 

So haywire amalina. 

Okay, I'm just gonna continue blogwalking until Harris wakes up for milk. And still waiting for husband to come home. Wasalam. Love, Nina M.