Aesthetic living .....NOT

There are so much things I want in life. And that includes creating contents for my blog, and probably start a youtube channel and post aesthetic things. But really, all I want is to be able to decorate my house as pleasing as I want it to be. But I guess its too hard because I tend to just impulsively buy things and just decorate as it is. I am not good at actually making changes. I just follow with whatever existing things and go on with it. It's super boring. 

I've been seeing reels of many shopee hauls, people rearranging their pantry, study desk whatnot, and its just so pleasing. It makes me jealous. But a good kind of jealous, since it motivates me to be better, to clean better. 

I deferred one semester and means I am not graduating this year. Sad but its what I have to do, with pregnancy, confinement and all. Unexpected are expected to come. I've been leaving my thesis for quite a while now and I really need to pick where I left it off. Physically and in my brain as well. Its been months and I should really start writing at least one page a day and really devote myself to it before semester starts and I can focus on having a chillax semester. My supervisor has been asking me quite many times to tell that he's available for any discussion but my lazy ass just keeps delaying. 

I think now is a very good time to continue because MCO seems to be never-ending and I ran out of things to do when its night time. It's getting sickly boring and mentally overwhelming but I am glad that we are still safe from the virus. The delta variant is spreading and seems nowhere near of stopping. 

Speaking of which, I finally got my vaccination date! I am not sure of what vaccine I will get since I am breastfeeding mother to a 2 months old baby, but recent updates saying all vaccines are suitable. I am more scared of the side effects though. 

Tomorrow is Hari Raya Aidiladha. Another raya without my grandpa, and my relatives, my family, my siblings. Just the four of us. Still, the 2nd raya for Hannah and we should be celebrating! 

I have no mood to masak-masak for raya though. Today is hari arafah and all deeds for today is counted as double. I am not able to puasa though, since I am breastfeeding but there are many good deeds for me to do. Zikir a lots and maintain all good mood for the whole day! 

Wasalam. Love, Nina M.