Have you ever felt like time is moving so swiftly and there are things you wish you did better? I am now! I mean, Harris is one year old already and he's now a toddler. I always fancy looking at Harris crawling. He crawls so fast and so effing cute with his giggling and all. And now, he's baby stepping and he just wants to walk all the time and its cute, but you know what's worst? I miss seeing him crawl. I wish I recorded much of his actions and spent more time with him. I mean, I've been such a bad mother. When I got home from work, I often on the phone and spent less time just looking at this boy. The miracle. Sometimes I just couldnt believe I gave birth to this cute and cheeky boy. Too bad my amazement doesnt really reflect in my actions. I neglected him a lot. I often come back home late and feeling so tired and the only time spent was on bed. I am lucky that he clings to me still because of breastfeeding. The only time he clings to me like a koala. Wanting milk and cuddling and all.
I am feeling so emotional right now because I should've been a better mother. I should cherish all this clingy duration of him very very well because I realized the time move so swiftly and in a blink of an eye, he wont be needing me anymore. I swear I would cry. I mean, I am crying now.
He's now 1 year old guys. And the next thing I know, I would be kissing his cheek for him to get married. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Is this what being a mother feels like? I miss seeing him cooing and playing buu buu with his saliva. I miss him crawling the most, crying nowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
THIS CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKY BOY
And just me being lazy wearing the same tudung twice this week. Is it just pure laziness or this happens to be my favorite bawal now?
So now, my target is to be the best mother I could be!
Wasalam. Love, Nina M.
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